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Frugal Beauty Tips by Audrey Hepburn
For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.
For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.
For beautiful hair, let a child run his/her fingers through it once a day.
For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone.
People, even more than things, need to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone.

We’re a board game family. Here are some of the award winners we love and actually play: Blokus, Quoridor, Sequence and DaVinci Challenge. We still enjoy the classics like MasterMind, Clue, Battleship, Jenga, and of course… Monopoly!

For more Works For Me Wednesday tips go to Rocks in My Dryer.  Feel free to stay and look around my site.

It is times like these that a mother stands at the crossroad and guides her children in the way they should go. Your children will watch and listen as you guide them in how they should act and react to others’ unkind behavior. If you fail to step up to that crossroad and give them direction, that will make as much of an impression on their hearts and minds.

There are times to let children work it out amongst themselves, but they must first learn the skills of working it out. I know it’s a tiring, thankless task, but you are the one God has given the job to. How you handle yourself means so much.

Do you blow the children off and let them duke it out? Do you yell at them and not get an obedient response? Do you have their hearts?

In these situations I long to be a woman full of grace. I know children who were rotten when they were young and grew up to be perfectly fine adults. I’m one of them! I want to give other peoples’ children the grace to grow up and mature. I don’t want to judge them or their parents. Not everyone parents the same. There are many different philosophies, methods, etc. Differences can be extreme at times, but we all (for the most part) love our children and seek to do what is best for them.

Not only do I want to be gracious in my thoughts, I want to be gracious in my speech. I remember countless times of comforting little hearts. When something went wrong with a friendship, instead of gossiping and saying something like, “She’s a brat”, I would ask my children how the situation made them feel. I would ask them what they would have done differently, how dealing with an issue straight on would have been better, and when I honestly could say it, I would say, “I’m glad you don’t do that and hurt other peoples’ feelings.”

Listening and talking through friendship issues, and praying with your children are some of the biggest helps you can offer them as you stand at that crossroad for them and with them as a mother.

My children enjoy one-on-one time with me. It seems funny because we’re all home together 24-7-365. My husband even works from the home so we are all really together all the time. You’d think my children would be sick of me.

When we have “Mommy and (insert name of child) time”, we go into my bedroom, close the door, sometimes eat a snack/drink hot chocolate and talk. Sometimes there is an issue on the heart he/she wants to discuss. Sometimes I start with asking questions, or I have them fill in the blank with sentences like, “When I’m a grown-up I will never _____.” I see where there hearts are with those kinds of questions. It’s a precious time – especially if I get a back rub.

Sometimes you just have to take a hit for your child. I will allow myself to be the scapegoat if my child feels he/she is in a predicament. I’m willing to look like the bad guy if it saves major face in certain situations. That can be a tricky though. We want our children to take a bold stand for truth and what is right. However, there are times when their young immature hearts can’t handle peer pressure. I’m fine with them saying, “My parents won’t let me do that.” if they’re tempted and pressured beyond their own abilities and need me as their out.

Finally, though I hurt for lonely hearts, I know that loneliness is far better for a child than bad influence. I would rather my children make friends with books and use their imagination in self play, and play with one another than keep company with corrupt acquaintances. I would rather they be painfully lonely than endure what long term consequences come from keeping bad company.

You’re in a serious, precious position of guardian over your children. Keep at it, press on, this time is short. I know it doesn’t feel like it when you’re in the thick of diapers and spit-up, but God is at the crossroad for you. Lean on him.

My daughter and I were getting out of the car, and Dad came walking over to us with a big smile. He looked young – in his early 50’s, with no gray hair. I knew he had been dead and I wanted to ask him how he got here, but I knew we only had about a minute with him. I said, with excitement, “Honey, get out of the car, that’s your grandpa!” She got out and from the look on her face I could tell she remembered him.

There were no hugs or words. He was sort of walking by, but saying a big happy hello to us with his facial expression. I remember thinking – Oh no! The boys aren’t here! Then I woke up. It was good to see him looking so young and happy.

My best friend died about 10 years ago. On occasion I get to dream about her as well. Though I don’t read anything into the dreams, aside from the obvious fact that I miss them both, I always wake up thankful for the visit.

We guard our children’s hearts from worldliness, bad attitudes & behaviors, the herd mentality, defensiveness in relationships and resistance to correction (this is the short list). This doesn’t mean they don’t struggle with this on their own. Our little darlings are plenty selfish and sinful. However, I don’t want to willfully put my children, for extensive lengths of time, in the company of others who are oblivious to this type of training.

I want to make it very clear at this point, that I’m not someone who feels she must protect her children from undisciplined, impolite, selfish, spoiled children. Quite the opposite is true. They need to experience all types of people. However, who we closely associate with, spend much time with, and entrust their hearts to are those individuals who breathe life into their little hearts and minds.

Yes, my children have friends who point them to Jesus, who are honest, sensitive, respectful, loving, wholesome, humble and fun. No, these children, like mine, are not without their faults – and sometimes big ones.

My children are, at the moment, 7, 8 & 13. There are children they play with on a daily basis who they don’t consider close friends, and some they do consider close friends. They know that when a friend has to one-up you, lie, deceive, tell secrets and laugh at you, act like their your best friend when it’s just the two of you but exclude you when others are around, etc. that person is not a true, close friend.

However, our kids have friends who live at least a 30 minute drive away and they only see them a couple times a month at best. They are truly close, dear friends our children have learned they can entrust their hearts to. These friends include one another, purpose to not leave anyone out, are giving and loving, sincerely get excited for one another when someone succeeds, etc.

Because we started early in defining what a good friend is (even among siblings), our children can easily identify and tell me why someone is or isn’t a good friend. In turn, they know when they are or are not being good friends themselves.

Life is not picture perfect at our house. This is a relationship skill that is always a work in progress (for mom and dad as well). We are such selfish, pathetic people when left to ourselves, and we always need to be aware of that fact. This is all part of fighting the good fight. Our children need us to pave the way and live a life of example (ouch).

Stay tuned for Part 3 – A Mother’s Response to Her Children’s Difficult Relationships